Grapes 2.0

April 30, 2008

Rough Diamond — Second Thoughts Lyrics

Filed under: American Idol, Neil Diamond, YouTube — grapes2dot0 @ 11:13 pm

The handprints of Neil Diamond in front of The Great Movie Ride at Walt Disney World's Disney's Hollywood Studios theme park.Image via WikipediaAn occasional series about the lyrics songwriters might not have written had they given it a second thought. This week, in celebration of the continuing massacre of popular music that is American Idol, the culprit is Neil Diamond, usually an unadventurous lyricist and therefore one not too prone to gaffes. However in I Am, I Said, he tried his hand at a bit of existential introspection:

I am, I said
To no one there
And no one heard at all
Not even the chair

It goes on:

Did you ever read about a frog who dreamed of being a king
And then became one
Well, except for the names and a few other changes
If you talk about me, the story’s the same one

So he became a king, did he? Or is that just one of the “few other changes”?

But I got an emptiness deep inside
And I’ve tried but it won’t let me go
And I’m not a man who likes to swear
But I’ve never cared for the sound of being alone

The sound of being fucking alone, surely? Perhaps he didn’t swear because he’s not a man who likes to swear? In which case, why tell us?

Bad. Just bad. But! Not as bad as the job done on his twitching corpse by the shamsters of AI. Check it out on YouTube, with commentary (never miss it, every week) by The Harpoonist.

Voices

Filed under: Uncategorized — grapes2dot0 @ 3:51 pm

lovebirds.Image via WikipediaHere’s a message from a French lovebird.

This one’s from a German wing-commander.

This is one of the boys from the Old Country.

Great fun. The trick to write it so it sounds right. It’s harder than you think.

Ask this guy.

HB2U

Filed under: Uncategorized — grapes2dot0 @ 6:37 am

Humorous Pictures
see more crazy cat pics

April 26, 2008

Conversation

Filed under: Uncategorized — grapes2dot0 @ 8:13 pm

So I met this guy, right, and I was like, What do you do? and he was like, I’m a plant geneticist specialising in salad greens and I’m all like, Dude get over yourself, I mean it’s hardly rocket science.


A punchline pictured yesterday

April 25, 2008

Jazz legend Lyttelton dies at 86

Filed under: Humphrey Lyttelton — grapes2dot0 @ 10:50 pm

I’m sorry I haven’t a hankie.

BBC NEWS

ETA:

Humph is seated, as you can see, beside the lovely Samantha.

Here’s another clip, audio-only this time.


April 23, 2008

Glad

Filed under: Uncategorized — grapes2dot0 @ 11:39 pm

You have been gladrolled.

Railway tank fail

Filed under: Uncategorized — grapes2dot0 @ 11:33 pm

Fail.

April 21, 2008

News values

Filed under: torture — grapes2dot0 @ 10:25 pm

Flashback

Filed under: Puffy Shirt — grapes2dot0 @ 4:51 pm

The Puffy ShirtImage via Wikipedia

Last night I dreamed I watched The Puffy Shirt again.

Fifteen years, and still that style hasn’t come back into fashion.


April 19, 2008

Life experience

Filed under: Ockham — grapes2dot0 @ 8:31 pm

has been illustratedImage via WikipediaTake a look at this picture of William of Ockham.

You see it? The guy is clean-shaven.

So this is someone who knew a lot about razors, okay? Listen when he says something.

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